


The Fake Relationship

by charliechick117



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Background Bofur/Nori - Freeform, Background Relationships, Background Thorin/Bilbo - Freeform, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-07 01:51:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12830805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charliechick117/pseuds/charliechick117
Summary: With Balin hanging over Dwalin's head to "settle down" and him having no intention to do so, Dwalin does the only thing he can think of, which is make up a relationship to keep his brother away.  He didn't realize how quickly it would escalate.





	1. The Plot

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Week of Dwori Cliches](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1078998) by [charliechick117](https://archiveofourown.org/users/charliechick117/pseuds/charliechick117). 



> I've really like the scenario I created during day 7 of the Dwori cliches (which was literally years ago) and I wanted to get back into it and, well, here we are!
> 
> Just to clarify, in case you didn't/don't read the drabble that inspired this, Dwalin and Nori are the two that are fake dating - but they are in a completely platonic relationship. In the process of this fraud, however, Dwalin spends a lot of time with Ori and that's how they end up together.
> 
> Any Dwalin/Nori scenes are not slashy or shippy in any way.

Dinner was another tense affair.  Dwalin was getting used to it.  He spent most of his dinners alone in his own apartment, tending to his few plants and letting the game play in the background while he looked over his cases.  However, Balin had insisted Dwalin come for dinner at least once a week.  It wasn't so bad at first, Balin often had a fresh perspective on his cases and it was relaxing to be with his brother, no obligations or expectations.

Then Balin met Penelope and Dwalin's life became a living hell.

The food was delicious, as always, but Dwalin could only find himself able to chew through it mechanically, waiting for the inevitable.  Penelope gently set down her silverware and coughed politely.  Dwalin glanced up and his brother swallowed thickly, leaning forward over the table.

"Penelope and I were thinking," Balin spared a soft smile for his wife, reaching out and taking her hand.  "There are some lovely people at the hospital who are more than willing to meet you."

"Balin, I've told you, I'm not interested in seeing someone right now," Dwalin said.  "Work has me swamped, I don't have time for it."

"We understand, of course," Penelope said.  "Work is obviously a priority, and we respect that, but your life is so much more fulfilled when you have a partner.  Aren't you lonely in your apartment?"

Dwalin shook his head and speared a large piece of broccoli on his fork.  "I've got my plants.  Spend most of my time at work anyway."

"I have a nurse I want you to meet," Penelope said, her voice firm.  "She'll be here next Sunday for dinner."

Dwalin just barely restrained himself from groaning and slamming his head on the table.

"Penelope, I don't want to see anyone," Dwalin insisted.  "I'm happy like this.  I don't want a relationship.  I'm spending so much time at work that anyone I dated wouldn't see me anyway, why force someone into that?"

"If it's the right person, then that won't matter," Balin said.  "We just want you to be happy."

Dwalin left soon after.  His apartment was only a few blocks away from Balin and Penelope's house and he usually walked to their place for dinner.  It was late September and the weather was turning cool.  It was perfect weather for walking and Dwalin's thoughts drifted back to the case files in his apartment.  He wasn't any kind of detective, didn't have stacks of case files that he'd seen on desks at the precinct, but he did have a few of his own cases - just traffic violations or drug arrests.

His apartment complex came into view and Dwalin stopped by his car to pick up his paperwork and noticed a familiar motorcycle in the guest parking.  Dwalin grabbed his papers, locked his car, and jogged upstairs to his apartment.  He didn't bother with the keys, just walked right on in.  Sitting at his table was Nori, his friend and private investigator to the precinct, a bottle of beer opened in front of him.

"Did you use the key this time?" Dwalin asked, locking the door behind him and tossing his papers on the table.

"Nah.  Gotta keep my skills sharp," Nori grinned.  He pulled the papers closer and idly flipped through them.  "How was dinner?"

"Horrible," Dwalin went to the kitchen and pulled out his own beer.  "Balin is still trying to hook me up with someone."

Nori kicked out a chair and Dwalin sat down in it heavily.  He had known Nori since he was a common criminal and helped him turn his life around and, since then, he'd been using his connections and skills for good.  It had been a source of grief for Nori's brothers and Dwalin had been a part of their family ever since.

"You should just pretend to date someone," Nori shrugged.  "I mean, it worked for me when Dori got to be too much."

"You have an unending supply of contacts and dozens of people who would gladly be your partner.  I can't imagine it was that difficult for you."

"You underestimate yourself, Dwalin," Nori said.  "A big, burly guy like you?  You're a category on porn sites, my dude."

Dwalin laughed and pulled his papers from Nori's grasp.  He filled them out while Nori talked about his brothers.  Dori had already scared two of his students into tears, despite the semester barely starting.  Ori was working on a sixth draft of his novel, but he still hadn't sent it out to any publishers - too afraid of rejection.  Dwalin's apartment felt warmer when Nori was in, almost as if he brought his brothers' love as well.

Since Balin's wedding, Dwalin had found himself spending more time with Nori and his brothers.  He had sat at their table, eating Dori's glorious cooking while listening to Ori talk about his manuscripts.  He and Nori had discussed laws and crimes over dessert while Dori graded homework.  They crowded into Dwalin's apartment, with Balin and Penelope, for football and game nights.

The thought of Balin and Penelope brought a frown to Dwalin's face.  Nori had a great idea, to fake a relationship, but Dwalin was at a loss on who he could be in a convincing relationship with.  No one at work would be willing and the only friends he had other than that were Nori, Dori and Ori.

"Say, Nori," Dwalin paused from where he was writing (recounting arrests was so annoying).  "You do this fake relationship thing a lot?"

"Not for a while," Nori pulled up his phone and rapidly tapped on it.  "I think the last time was... Ori's 21st birthday?  Dori had insisted on a huge party, brought his own gal pal in fact, and insisted I had a plus one as well.  So I brought in one of my more favorable clients.  He did astoundingly well, come to think of it." Nori mused.  "Should probably see what he's up to..."

"So would you date me?" Dwalin pushed.  "Help me get Balin off my back?"

"Ha!" Nori barked out a laugh.

"Didn't you say I was my own porn site category?"

"Didn't mean you were my type."

"Please, Nori, you gotta help me.  You're the only one who Balin would believe.  You spend almost half your time here anyway!"

Nori hummed.  "Still not selling it to me."

"I'll give you... anything, Nori."

Nori lifted his eyebrow and eyed Dwalin up and down.  "Anything?"  He set his phone down and leaned across the table, close enough that Dwalin could see the mischievous glimmer in Nori's eyes.

"Anything."

"I want a date with your homicide detective."

"Done."

"Then we have a deal."

Dwalin stuck his hand out and Nori took it.  He tugged Dwalin in close and pressed a kiss to his cheek.  Dwalin flushed and pulled back.  Nori laughed and pulled out his phone.

"Dori and Ori are going to have a fit," Nori cackled.  "Oh, Dwalin, this is going to be so much  _fun_."


	2. The Youngest

September began to wane and the trees turned from green to orange and red.  The air was cool and crisp and Dwalin had the windows to his cruiser rolled down.  It had been a long day.  Dwalin had been swamped with paperwork, made two extra arrests, and had to chase a fleeing suspect down two city blocks.  He was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to drive home and take a long, hot shower.

Instead, he was driving to visit Nori.  Balin had taken the bait, believed that he and Nori were dating.  Dwalin had hoped his troubles would end, but instead they seemed to multiply.  Now, Balin and Penelope were insisting on double dates, on outings together, and Dwalin found himself and Nori in far too many romantic situations.  It was exhausting, having to put up this kind of front, but it was better than having Balin at his back.

Surprisingly, Dwalin realized, it was easy to pretend that Nori was his boyfriend.  They had been working together for years, with all their inside jokes and friendly banter, it wasn't any different than before.  Except that Nori kept using every excuse to touch him, hold his hand, kiss his cheek.

It was time to set some boundaries.

Dwalin pulled into the short driveway.  Ori was raking leaves in the front, whispering to himself.  Dwalin laughed to himself, Ori had always been a little daydreamer, head in the clouds with stories to tell.  Young and optimistic, Dwalin had watched Ori grow from a naive student to a wise and gentle bookworm.  Still too optimistic, if Dwalin was honest, but it was admirable.

"Anyone die today?" Ori called out as Dwalin stepped from his car.

"Not yet," Dwalin shook his head.  "Is Nori home?"

"Still in the office.  Which is why I am doing his chore right now," he gestured to the leaves around him.

Dwalin walked into the garage and pulled out another rake.  "Work goes faster with company, eh?"

Ori smiled and they started their work.  The yard went quickly between the two of them.  Ori rambled about his newest novel and the troubles he was facing with it.  Dwalin couldn't do much more than grunt in response, but that never bothered Ori.  Dori came home not long after, carrying a binder of papers and folders.  He waved to Dwalin and Ori, reminding them to wash up before dinner, as if they were children, not full grown adults.

The sun set further down the horizon and the chill crept in.  Ori pulled his scarf tighter around his neck and blew on his fingers, trying to warm them.  Dwalin wiped the sweat from his forehead, his body warm from the exertion.  Ori shivered and curled in so tightly on himself that Dwalin only saw his bright eyes.

Dwalin took Ori's hands in his, rubbing their fingers together.  They were like icicles.

"You bookish types," Dwalin said, with a low, rumbling laugh.  "Balin has the same problems in the cold.  Poor circulation and all that."

"Good thing Nori has you then," Ori grinned.  "You think I have cold hands?  He's got thief's fingers, colder than mine any day.  Do you keep his fingers warm like this?"

Dwalin blushed a tremendous pink and dropped Ori's hands.  Ori was right, of course, he had held Nori's cold fingers and kept them warm during their double dates.  He was surprisingly familiar with Nori's icy fingers.

"Does he hang onto your arm when you go out?" Ori asked suddenly.  "Nori is very good at being eye-candy.  Certainly that does good things when Balin's around.  Or does he give you those big moon eyes?  He taught me that trick, says it's good for distracting big, burly men."

"When do you run into big burly men?" Dwalin asked, standing up straight.

"Well, there is one that I see occasionally," Ori shrugged and turned to the pile of leaves, kicking it as he walked by.  "He's big, burly, somewhat threatening."

Dwalin grabbed Ori's shoulder and pulled him around.  This was Ori, the youngest brother of a family that took him in.  He, who was sweet and innocent, the perfect target for someone.  Concern dropped in his stomach like a stone at the thought of Ori in trouble.

"Ori, are you being threatened?" Dwalin asked, holding Ori's shoulders tightly.  "You know I'd do anything to protect you."

"Big, burly man?" Ori repeated, looking up at Dwalin with those big eyes, warm and sparkling in the dying light.  "Tell me, Officer, can you protect me from yourself?"

Dwalin blinked and Ori laughed.

Nori's motorcycle roared onto the lawn, blowing the leaves that had been so carefully raked up.  Ori was still laughing at Dwalin's stunned silence.  Nori jumped off his bike and practically sauntered up to Dwalin, swinging an arm around him and pressing a noisy kiss to his cheek.  Dwalin stiffened at the contact.

"Aw, be nice, Nori," Ori scolded, gathering the rakes from the ground.  "He's already blushing, just leave him be."

Ori set the rakes in the garage and went inside the house, Dwalin couldn't stop his eyes from trailing after him.  When had Ori grown so saucy?  And what was he saying about Dwalin?  Big, burly man, distracted by big moon eyes.  Even though Ori had wide eyes, sparkling with some youthful mischief, Dwalin had never felt so disarmed in his life.

"Are you even listening?" Nori punched Dwalin on the shoulder.

"To you?  Never."

"Ha, funny," Nori kicked the leaves on the ground.  "Staring after Ori?"

"He's different than I remember," Dwalin shrugged.  "More... outspoken."

"You mean he talked back to you?" Nori guessed.  "He's been spending time with the Durin boys.  They're a good influence on him."

Dwalin barked out a laugh.  Fili and Kili, good influences?  Dwalin would eat his badge before admitting to that.  Dori shouted from the door, saying something about dinner growing cold, and Nori and Dwalin filed inside.

Their house was a small 3 bedroom 2 bath, something they had inherited from their mother.  It had taken Dori and Nori years before they emptied her bedroom and sold her decrepit furniture.  Now the house was their home, not a tomb to their late mother.  Here and there were remnants of her influence; a knitted afghan thrown over the sofa in the living room, her favorite porcelain teapot in the china cabinet, the far wall held a portrait of her and her three sons.

Fond memories of her, the one thing that united the three brothers.  Dori had added his knitting to the house, mostly dishcloths and doilies.  His various degrees were displayed proudly along the walls and the desk he had tucked in the living room.  Pictures were on every spare space of wall.  Pictures of Ori as a teenager, of him graduating from college.  Pictures of Nori buying his office, standing next to a younger looking Dwalin.

The front door opened to the kitchen, where Dori was bustling about.  It wasn't often that all three were home for dinner and less often that Dwalin stopped by to visit.  Ori was setting out plates and Nori slipped past the chaos and through the living room into his own room, leaving Dwalin standing awkwardly in his uniform at the door.

"Don't just stand there!" Dori snapped.  "Help Ori with the dishes!"

Dwalin jumped into action, taking the plates from Ori and placing them on the table that sat in the middle of the large kitchen floor.  Then came the cups and the silverware.  Nori reappeared with two extra chairs and Dwalin paused.

"Who else is coming?" Dwalin asked, counting, not four places at the table, but seven.

"Fili and Kili are," Nori said.  He reached over the table and grabbed the bowl of mashed potatoes from Dori.  "Oh, and Thorin of course."

"Thorin never told me," Dwalin said.

"It was a spur of the moment thing," Ori explained as he helped Dori carry the roast to the table.  "Fili got accepted to that masters program he'd been worried about and Kili has two job interviews lined up.  And since they can't go home to celebrate we thought we'd do it for them."

Dwalin was struck, once again, by the friendliness and love that this little family had.  They had lost their mother young, Ori couldn't even remember her, and had their own share of family dramatics, yet they constantly opened up their home to welcome others.  They had let Dwalin come by for dinner whenever his own pantry went low and now they were celebrating Fili and Kili as if they were blood.

Thorin, Fili, and Kili arrived soon afterwards, ears and noses pink from the cool air.  The kitchen grew warm and crowded as everyone tried to find a seat.  Thorin set down a bottle of wine he had brought and helped to tidy up the last of the place settings.  Dwalin found himself squashed between Nori and Ori, elbows bumping as Dori poured the wine and cut into the roast.

It was a crowded, bustling affair.  The dinner was delicious, as Dori's food always was.  Simple, hearty, and somehow always reminded Dwalin of home.  Dori dished out a heaping portion of broccoli to Ori who turned up his nose at it.  When Dori turned away to speak with Thorin, Ori quickly dumped his broccoli onto Dwalin's plate, offering a saucy grin.

Dwalin ate every last piece of broccoli.

After dinner, Ori, Fili and Kili went to the living room to watch some television show that their friend Gimli had suggested to them.  Dwalin gathered up the dishes and went to the sink.  Thorin came up next to him and they washed the dishes together, Dwalin scrubbing and Thorin rinsing.

"You didn't tell me about this," Dwalin mentioned.

"I wasn't aware until today," Thorin shrugged.  "I'm more surprised to see you here!  Balin and Penelope getting on your case again?"

"It's not that," Dwalin scrubbed at a stubborn gravy spot.  "I came to talk to Nori, put some conditions on our... situation."

"Ah, of course," Thorin took the plate from Dwalin and rinsed it clean.  "Not enough to convince Balin?"

"The opposite, actually, it's too much."

"Why does that bother you?" Thorin asked.  "A little PDA would keep Balin at bay.  Besides, you're not tied down to anyone and Nori certainly isn't either."

Dwalin thought briefly of Bofur, the homicide detective who had caught Nori's eye.  Then his mind shifted, inexplicably, to Ori.

"I dunno," Dwalin said.  "Just does."

Dwalin left dinner with a promise from Nori to tone down his affection and a grateful smile from Ori for helping with the leaves.  He went to sleep with Ori's smile still on the fringes of his mind.


	3. The Dinner

Dwalin pulled up to the restaurant and groaned.  It was far too 'black-tie' for Dwalin and he almost turned out of the parking lot.  He could make up some excuse about Nori being sick and not show up to this dinner.  It was the fourth one this month and if he had to listen to another one of Nori's fake anecdotes, he was going to lose it.

"Your brother has excellent taste," Nori commented from the passenger seat.  "I've only been here a handful of times, but it's definitely upper class."

"He and Penelope _are_ upper class," Dwalin muttered.  "I can't do this, Nori.  I can't go in there and pretend to be some high class, snobby rich prick like my brother."

"But you gotta!  The whole plan!"

"I can say you were sick!  Or that Ori got sick and Dori is having a crisis or that there's a robbery downtown.  Anything except for this."

Nori leaned over the center console.  He was dressed like he belonged, hair slicked back and tuxedo pressed fittingly down his body.  He even had a real bow tie, not a fake clip-on one that Dwalin kept hidden in his closet for weddings and funerals.  Dwalin felt restricted in his own suit, the collar tight on his throat.  He would much rather be sitting down at Bombur's diner dressed in his favorite worn shirt and soft jeans with Ori across the table and - 

Dwalin blinked.

"Okay," Nori nodded.  "I understand.  Besides, I kind of had a later appointment anyway."

"Bofur?"

Nori winked.  "Got it in one, Officer.  Look, you take me home, I'll fake a phone call to Balin about being on my deathbed or some shit like that, and be on my merry way.  Then you can do... whatever it is you do."

Dwalin sank into his seat with relief.  The dread that came from having to sit at a silk table eating fancy portions of food with too many utensils had Dwalin on the edge of his seat.  Nori eyed him suspiciously.

"That bad?" he probed.  "It's just dinner, Dwalin.  We've done nothing but dinners the past month, and most of them were this fancy."

"It's not me," Dwalin sighed.  He threw his car into reverse and backed out of the parking lot.  "Balin has always been like this but I haven't.  I hoped having you would make Balin less like this, but I guess not."

Dwalin's memories with Balin were full of big dinner parties and elegant nights.  Balin had dragged him to the opera, to symphony concerts, to elaborate movie premiers, since they reached adulthood.  Even before then, Balin had always carried himself like a socialite should.  He was someone their father was proud of.  But Dwalin?  He had run around with toy swords and torn up clothes, ready to fight at a moments notice.  He had his mother's temperament, protective and aggressive.

It was how Dwalin made it to the academy to begin with.

Traffic was slow this time of night, people heading home after a long work day, families and couples going out to eat.  The drive to Nori's house took far longer than Dwalin was expecting and Nori kept checking his phone.

"Worried Bofur's going to stand you up?" Dwalin asked.

"No, it's Dori," Nori said absently.  "He has to stay late at school and he wants me to fix dinner for Ori.  As if he wasn't an adult!"

"I'll take care of him," Dwalin suddenly said, surprising himself.

"Because you can cook?" Nori looked at him skeptically.  "Yeah, no.  I'm not letting my baby brother eat whatever you make."

Dwalin rolled his eyes.  "I wasn't going to cook, god, Nori.  I'll take him down to Bombur's.  Dori trusts him."

"Ah, yes, good call."

They pulled up to the house and Dwalin parked in the driveway.  Nori practically sprinted out of the car and into the house, yanking at his bow tie.  Dwalin followed him and made sure the lock the door behind them.  Dwalin barely had time to sit down at the table before Nori was running out.  His tuxedo jacket was gone, as was the bow tie.  Instead he had put on suspenders and had a casual blazer over one arm.

Dwalin was rather impressed.

"Oh, right," Nori scrambled for his phone.  "The phone call to Balin.  Ori!  I hope you're listening!  Your favorite brother is about to deliver the performance of a lifetime!"

Ori poked his head from the living room.  He smirked, unimpressed, and leaned against the wall.  "Well, get on then."

With a flourish, Nori dialed Balin and put the phone to his ear.  Dwalin snickered.

"Balin?" Nori's voice was a croak.  "Sorry, it's Nori.  I - " Nori pulled away to fake a very convincing coughing fit "- I'm sorry, I got some kinda virus or something.  I dunno if Dwalin said anything but we're not gonna make it."  Nori coughed again.  "He's out getting some medicine for me right now, probably forgot to tell you.  You know how he gets, mother hen whenever I'm not feeling well."

Ori was giggling from the living room.

"Of course, of course," Nori said.  God, Nori sounded like he was  _dying_.  "Next time, Dwalin and I will take you two out, to make up for this.  I'm sorry, Balin.  Yeah, yeah, I will.  Goodnight."

Nori hung up, cleared his throat, and bowed.  Ori applauded.  Dwalin was scandalized.

"Mother hen?" he repeated.

"Psh, I was being nice," Nori slid into his blazer.  "Well, I'm off.  Make sure Ori get's fed and he's home by midnight."

"Nori!"

Cackling, Nori left, the door slamming behind him.  The sound of his motorcycle revving slowly faded into the night and Dwalin was left sitting in the kitchen with Ori staring at him.

"I swear," Ori shook his head and sat across from Dwalin.  "You'd think I was still a kid the way they treat me."

"Just looking out for you," Dwalin said.

Ori looked completely opposite of Dwalin, in a worn sweater and soft pants with fluffy socks.  Dwalin felt uncomfortably overdressed.

"Not that I don't love seeing Nori trick Balin, or see you, but why did you skip on dinner?" Ori asked.  "Wasn't that the whole point of this?"

"It's too fancy," Dwalin said.  "I don't like it.  It's exhausting to try and remember my manners and which fork is the dessert fork and to sip and barely taste anything."

"Sooo" Ori drawled out.  "You wanna go get dinner?"

Dwalin smiled.  "I'd love to."

Bombur's diner was a greasy joint downtown sandwiched between a retail shop and an arcade.  Bombur owned and ran it himself, with help from his cousin, Bifur.  The menu was filled with hearty, homey meals, with thick milkshakes and decadent pies on display.  Dwalin had introduced the other people on the force to it, and since then, the cops always had a special place at Bombur's diner.

Ori had wrangled Dwalin into some old clothes that he had left behind years ago.  The fit was a little tight but it was infinitely better than the suit he had been wearing.

Dinner was delicious and Dwalin dug into his steak and potatoes with gusto.  This was a real meal, a plate overfilling with food next to a pint of beer and good company to share it with.


	4. The Bookstore

"Tell me, how many times is too many times to use the same word in a paragraph?" Ori asked as he and Dwalin walked down to the bookstore.

"I'm not the one you should be asking," Dwalin said.  "Have Dori edit your book if you're that worried."

"He looks at it like a teacher though," Ori whined.  "I need a consumer to read it, someone who would pick it up off the shelf and read it."

"Ha!  I'm not that person either," Dwalin said.  "But I can take it to work if you want?  I'm sure someone there would have some advice."

Ori beamed.  It was a cool evening and with Halloween only a few weeks away, the stores were filled with decorations.  It was a slow night at the precinct and Dwalin was allowed to leave early.  Instead of heading home to his empty apartment, Dwalin went to the Rison's home.  He had been spending most of his spare time there.  It was warm and cozy and more friendly than anything Dwalin had with his own brother.

Not to say Dwalin didn't love his brother, the bonds of brotherhood were too strong to break that easily, but their relationship lacked the warmth and closeness of the Rison brothers.  It was something new to Dwalin, to be welcomed just the way he was and not asked to change.  He rather enjoyed it.

The bookstore door rang as they walked in.  Ori tucked his gloves into his coat pockets and untied his scarf around his neck, allowing it to fall down his front.  His cheeks were bright pink from the cold and he immediately walked to the back of the store.  Dwalin scrambled to follow him, but Ori in a bookstore was slippery to follow and Dwalin lost sight of him quickly.

The bookstore was quiet and fairly empty during this time of year.  There were a few patrons hovering by the cafe, the chatter a constant hum in the background.  Ori would turn up sooner or later, he always did, so Dwalin wandered around the shelves aimlessly.

Since Nori had pleaded sick, he and Dwalin had gone on only one double date with Balin and Penelope.  It had been nearly two weeks and Dwalin had never felt so relieved.  The other day, Bofur had come into work boasting an incredible hickey and grinning like a madman.

Dwalin was happy for them.  Nori had never been one to settle down and to see him so utterly besotted made Dwalin smile.  It's all Nori could talk about between their own dates, how sweet Bofur was, how funny and cute he was, the way he talked and so on and so forth.  Dwalin chuckled to himself.  Nori had been like a brother to him, between the arrests, the rehab, and the partnership, and he'd never seen Nori this happy.

It was nice.

"Dwalin!" someone called.

Turning around, Dwalin saw Thorin walking up to him.  His friend looked tired, bags heavy underneath his eyes, but he still smiled when he saw Dwalin.  He had a heavy book in his arms.  Thorin pulled Dwalin in for a quick one armed hug.

"What brings you here?" Thorin asked, pulling away.

"Escorting Ori," Dwalin explained.

Thorin looked around Dwalin, as if Ori was hiding behind him.  "Oh, really?"

Dwalin blushed.  "You know Ori.  He slipped away as soon as we walked in.  What are you doing here?"

Thorin hefted the book up in his arm.  It was a large book about the significant archaeology finds of the 19th century.  "It's for Fili, a congratulations for getting into the masters program.  I'm trying to find something for Kili."

"Right, their birthday is coming up," Dwalin said.  "I should get them something too.  Is Dis coming down for the celebrations?"

Thorin frowned.  "No.  The tickets are too expensive.  She'll be down for Christmas but that's all she can afford right now.  But Dori is hosting a tremendous party, he even called Bombur to help with the cooking.  Balin and Penelope are going to be there."

Dwalin's stomach sank down somewhere to his toes.  He didn't want Ori to see him and Nori together though he couldn't figure out why.

"And last I heard," Thorin leaned in.  "Nori had wanted to bring Bofur.  Wouldn't that make things a little awkward for dinner?"

"Make what awkward?" Ori poked around Dwalin.

Dwalin jumped.  He had forgotten that Ori could sneak up as quickly as he could sneak away.  He had a couple of books in his arms and looked between Dwalin and Thorin curiously.

"Fili and Kili's birthday celebration," Dwalin said quickly.

"Nori wants to bring Bofur," Thorin said.

Ori looked up at Dwalin.  His eyes were wide and Dwalin felt himself getting lost in the warm, honey gaze.  "Bofur, as in, the detective that Nori's been seeing?  As in, someone who would ruin what's going on with you and Nori?"

"Um, yeah," Dwalin said sheepishly.

"That can't happen," Ori insisted.  "If Balin finds out you and Nori aren't actually dating, he's going to start setting you up again."

"I can't tell him to not bring Bofur," Dwalin said.  "They're friends too."

Ori raised his eyebrow.  "Friends?"

"Okay, more than friends," Dwalin conceded.  "But the point still stands.  I can't ask Bofur to not show up because I'm worried about disappointing my brother."

"Just because Bofur's there doesn't mean that Balin needs to know what's going on," Thorin suddenly spoke up.  Dwalin had forgotten he was there, he was so zeroed in on Ori.  "I can keep Balin occupied.  Bofur knows about you and Nori, I'm sure we can do something to keep the secret a secret."

"Yeah!" Ori chimed in.  "I'll keep Bofur and Nori apart and I'm sure Thorin can distract Balin.  Besides that, everyone's going to be focusing on Fili and Kili anyway.  You know how Kili get's on his birthday."

Thorin laughed and even Dwalin managed a small chuckle.  When the twins had turned 21, they had gotten ridiculously drunk and Kili had paraded around with a crown on his head, dragging Fili behind him and making ridiculous demands as King for the Night.

"Don't worry, Officer, we'll take care of it," Ori said.  He had a suspicious glint in his eyes that made Dwalin nervous.  It was similar to the look Nori got when he was about to do something reckless or illegal.  Often both.  "Are you ready to go?"

"You check out, I'll meet you at the door."

Ori smiled beautifully and bounced to the checkout stand.  Dwalin watched him walk away until the shelves covered him from Dwalin's sight.  Thorin coughed and Dwalin turned back suddenly.  Thorin looked far too smug and Dwalin felt his face heat up.

"You go on ahead," Thorin said.  "Wouldn't want to keep him waiting."

The two of them bundled back up, Ori weighed down with two heavy bags.  Dwalin took the heavier bag, despite Ori's protests.  They walked down the street back to Ori's house, side by side.  Ori talked effortlessly about the different books he bought - a couple of historical textbooks, a psychological analysis, and a new novel he had been wanting to read.

Dwalin had never been with someone that was so effortless.  He had hardly spent time with Ori alone, usually Dori or Nori had been there as a buffer, but now Dwalin was wondering why he had waited so long to spend this time with Ori.  Ori bumped into Dwalin with a grin, their arms and hands brushing together. 


	5. The Party

Dwalin pulled up to the Rison's house.  Dori had decorated the house for Halloween, gravestones in the yard, spiderwebs across the trees.  The official celebration wasn't supposed to start for a few more hours, but Dwalin had wanted to talk with Nori before Balin showed up.  Bombur's catering van was parked in the driveway and Dwalin saw Dori jogging between the van and the house.  He spared a wave before hauling a huge platter inside.

Someone that Dwalin had never seen before puttered after Dori.  He was small and slight, with a mop of curly hair and rosy cheeks.  Dwalin walked up to him, patting him on the shoulder.  He jumped underneath of Dwalin's hands.  His eyes were very blue.

"Sorry," Dwalin said.  "Didn't mean to scare you.  I'm Dwalin.  I'm a friend of the family."

"Oh, yes!  Bombur mentioned you," he said.  "I'm Bilbo, by the way.  I'm one of Bombur's chefs.  He asked me to help with this, said I would like the twins."

"Most people do," Dwalin said.  "Would you like some help?"

Bilbo gratefully accepted Dwalin's help and the two of them were able to haul in the rest of the food.  Dori insisted that he would cook the cake, but couldn't deny asking for Bombur's help in cooking dinner.  The inside of the house was thrown into disarray.  Dori was barking orders and Bombur was sedately cooking and plating dishes.  Bilbo was running around the kitchen as if he didn't know what to do.

The inside was just as decorated as the outside.  The twins loved that their birthday fell so close to Halloween and had themed parties every year.  When they first moved in with Thorin, Dori had taken it upon himself to give them the birthday celebrations they desired.  Dwalin believed that Dori's maternal instinct was strong enough to encompass anyone near him - it sucked in Dwalin and Thorin and his family, and Dwalin could already see Bilbo start to fall into it.

Deciding to leave the chaos to the cooks, Dwalin quickly walked into the living room.  Ori was busy painting bloody hand prints on the patio window and Nori was hanging trash bags in the backyard.  Dwalin patted Ori on the shoulder with a smile and stepped out into the backyard.

"What do you think?" Nori asked, punching one of the bags.  "Supposed to look like dead bodies."

"You've seen plenty to know," Dwalin grinned.  "Realistic enough for the boys, I'm sure.  I wanted to talk before Balin showed up."

"About Bofur?" Nori guessed.  Dwalin nodded and Nori folded his arms.  "I've already talked to him about it.  It's Fili and Kili's birthday, I don't think Balin is going to be asking a lot of questions about us."

"I don't want him to think you're cheating on me," Dwalin said.  "He would consider it dishonorable and it would hurt your family's reputation."

"Don't worry!" Nori punched Dwalin in the arm.  "I've gotten you this far, I'll keep it up as long as you need me to."

Nori went back inside but Dwalin didn't follow him.  The backyard was large with a covered patio right outside the backdoor.  Trees lined the fence, fake bodies hanging from the branches.  Ori had hung lanterns years ago to try make the backyard more cozy at night.  Twinkle lights wrapped around the patio, casting the porch furniture in soft light.  In the middle of the yard was a fire pit that Dwalin and Nori spent all day digging last summer because Ori was craving homemade s'mores.

The patio door slid open and Ori stepped up next to Dwalin, putting a gentle hand on his arm.

"Are you and Nori okay?" he asked.  "He looked a little... um... upset."

"Can't be easy for him," Dwalin offered.  "To be with Bofur while helping me."

"Oh, yeah," Ori sighed and leaned up against Dwalin.  "I've never seen him like that."

"Who, Nori?"

"Yeah, he's all... besotted," Ori's voice tilted up with distaste.  Dwalin looked down and laughed at the disgusted crinkle in Ori's nose.  "I'm serious!  His eyes get all big and misty when he talks about Bofur."

"He can't be that bad."

"His phone background is a picture of Bofur!"

Dwalin's laughter cut short.  "Wow, that is pretty serious."

"How much longer are you going to keep it up?" Ori asked.  "It can't be forever, not with Bofur and Nori getting it on like they are."

"I don't want it forever... just through Christmas, at least," Dwalin said.  "I haven't... I don't know how to break it up without Balin getting... you know... offended."

Ori hummed and managed to push himself closer to Dwalin.  "I'm sure you'll figure something out."

Instinctively, Dwalin wrapped an arm around Ori shoulders, holding him close to his chest.  Ori fit comfortably underneath of Dwalin's arm, soft and warm and, for a moment, Dwalin thought he could stand like this forever.

Ori looked up at Dwalin beneath thick eyelashes.  His eyes were wide and warm, sparkling with the lights in the yard.  Dwalin's breath caught in his throat.  When had Ori grown to be so gorgeous?  Or had it always been there and Dwalin was just blind to it?  His cheeks were flushed pink and he had a small smile on his face, staring at Dwalin completely openly.

"Ori," Dwalin whispered.

"Yes, Officer?" Ori's voice was just as breathless as Dwalin felt.

Where Ori's lips always that plump and dusky pink?  Would they feel as plush as Dwalin imagined they would be?  What would it feel to have Ori's clever, delicate fingers tangle in his hair?  To hear how low Ori's voice could go or see how far down that blush of his went?  Dwalin lifted his free hand and gently brushed his thumb over Ori's cheek, cradling Ori's face in the palm of his hand.

Ori lifted his face higher, his eyes darkening.  Dwalin felt himself lean down until their noses barely brushed together.

The door slid open again and Dori shouted, "If you two are  _quite_ done I have more work for you!"

The spell was broken and Dwalin backed up to a respectable distance, dropping his hand from Ori's cheek.  Ori chuckled and bowed his head.  Dwalin's heart was pounding in his chest and his head was spinning.

"Better help Dori before he has a fit," Ori said awkwardly.  He pulled away and went inside, closing the door gently behind him, sparing one last look at Dwalin.

 

The party was magnificent.  Dori's house hadn't been this filled since the last holiday season.  There was hardly enough room in the kitchen for everyone to sit, so Bombur had set up a buffet line in the kitchen and they sat in the living room or out on the patio with plates on their knees.  True to his word, Thorin kept much of Balin and Penelope's attention on him, asking about their future and such.  Bofur kept a perfectly safe distance from Nori, choosing to sit beside his brother instead.

Nori, true to his promise, was glued next to Dwalin, giving just enough physical contact that was expected of a couple.  Fili and Kili were the star of the night, tearing through presents and calling their mother and getting ridiculously drunk as the night wore on.  Bofur told horror stories from the homicide department that were fitting for a Halloween celebration.

It was possible, just maybe, that Dwalin was going to make it through this night.  He and Nori settled into the couch, hands intertwined easily.  Dwalin's eyes drifted over to Ori, who was sitting on the ground by Bofur's feet, writing notes at whatever Bofur was saying.

"If the boys are ready, the cake has all the candles lit!" Bilbo came into the living room.  He had been absent for most of dinner and Dwalin nearly forgot he was here.  "And it's a marvelous cake too, if I do say so myself.  Dori is an excellent baker."

Dori puffed with pride and Nori raised his drink in a toast and the rest followed suit.  Bombur walked in, a hefty, three tiered cake balancing on a tray.  It was decorated with red frosting, candy bones and licorice spiders.  Fili and Kili both had their jaws on the ground at the sight of this cake with 46 candles, 23 for each of them.  They sang Happy Birthday and the boys blew out the candles.

The cake was as delicious as it looked, moist cake with buttercream frosting.  Dwalin had barely finished his helping when Balin and Penelope suddenly scooted their chairs to him and Nori.  It was simply too good to be true, Dwalin should have known this was going to happen sometime tonight.

Where the hell was Thorin?

Dwalin leaned forward and peeked into the kitchen and, sure enough, there was Thorin, cornering Bilbo into a conversation.  Traitor.

"Balin and I have been talking," Penelope said.  "And we think we may have been a little too eager in supporting your relationship."  She shared a meaningful look with her husband.  "If someone had tried to force our relationship too quickly... I doubt we'd be married right now."

"It's just so good to see you two so happy," Balin said with a bright grin.  "I never thought I'd see my brother settle down."

Nori's hand tightened in Dwalin's hand and he leaned up against him, plastering a fake smile on his face.  He gave some cheeky response that left Penelope laughing but Dwalin didn't hear it.  His eyes were drawn to Ori.  He was still sitting beside Bofur but his note taking had stopped and he was staring at Dwalin with a blank expression.

"Excuse me," Dwalin stood up.  He pressed a quick kiss to Nori's cheek for show and, when he had turned to go out the back door, noticed that Ori's blank face seemed a little cracked on the edges.

The windows were fogged up from the warmth and, from on the patio, the party looked warm and inviting.  Dwalin turned up his collar and walked out to the swinging porch in the back corner of the yard.  It creaked underneath his weight and Dwalin swung slowly back and forth on it.

What was  _wrong_ with him lately?  It seemed like Dwalin couldn't keep his head on straight anymore.  Thorin had said, weeks ago when this tryst first started, that it should be easy.  And it had been easy until Nori had fallen for Bofur and Dwalin -

Dwalin what?  Grew a soft spot for Ori?

But it wasn't just that, was it?

The patio door opened and Dwalin glanced up to see Ori make his way towards him.  Dwalin slid over and let Ori sit beside him.  They moved the swing back and forth.  From here, Dwalin could see into the living room.  Thorin and Bilbo had joined the rest of the group, standing awkwardly close to each other.  Dwalin would have to grill Thorin on that later.

"Dwalin," Ori said suddenly.  "I just... I shouldn't but I have to ask."  Ori reached out and took one of Dwalin's hands in both of his own.  Ori's fingers were delicate but calloused and they traced the back of his hand.  "Before the party... when we were out here.  What was... what were you going to do?"

"Are you sure you want to know?" Dwalin whispered.  He turned his hand over, allowing Ori's fingers to interlace with his own.  It felt so natural to hold hands with Ori, not at all like holding Nori's hand during dinner which felt uncomfortable and forced.

"I have an overactive imagination on the best of days," Ori said.  "Just... tell me I wasn't imagining what happened because... because I've imagined it hundreds of times before."

Dwalin shushed him and lifted Ori's hand up to his lips, kissing the soft skin there.  "Hundreds of times?  What were you imagining, Ori?"

Ori bit his lip.  The alcohol was warm in Dwalin's system and made him feel a little more reckless.  He bent down and press his lips to Ori's in a quick, dry kiss.

"Was that it?" Dwalin whispered.

"Not quite," Ori said.  "More like this-" Ori pulled Dwalin down for another kiss, this one deeper and more intense.  Dwalin couldn't stop his hands from cupping Ori's face, cradling it and angling it to deepen the kiss even further.  Ori shifted slightly, tucking one leg underneath and hitching the other over Dwalin's leg.

In the back of his mind, Dwalin was aware of the party celebration happening only a few yards away.  If someone stepped out to the patio, it would be easy to see the two of them, wrapped around each other when they shouldn't be.  But most of Dwalin didn't care, he just wanted to keep kissing Ori.  He wanted to hear the little gasps and feel those nimble fingers.

Dwalin pulled back.  Ori looked debauched, his cheeks flushed bright pink and lips kiss swollen and wet.  He looked at Dwalin with dark, hooded eyes.

"Ori... we... I mean..." Dwalin stuttered, trying desperately to slow his heart rate.  "I can't.  We shouldn't."

"You said you don't want to do this thing with Nori forever," Ori said.  "You said you want to end it someday."

"That doesn't mean that this is what I want instead," Dwalin said.  Ori jerked backwards and Dwalin's hands fell uselessly in his lap.  "Ori, it's late and confusing.  I don't know what I should do.  I don't know what I want."

"Well, I know what I want," Ori stood up and the swing lurched underneath the change in weight.  "And I think, Officer, if you thought about it, you would know what you want too."

"Ori - "

But he was gone, back into the party like nothing had changed.  Dwalin's lips still tingled from the kiss and his hands were cold.  He sent a text to Nori, apologizing for leaving the twins like this, and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dori is basically the ultimate Mom Friend.


	6. The Eldest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long time since I have felt so much inspiration while writing and this fic has really sparked me back into it. So thanks, to the few of you who are still with me, for sticking it out as I rediscover my writing muse with this silly thing. :D

November blew in over night, leaving the city covered in sparkling frost and a sense of grey in the air.  Dwalin wondered if Ori had enough layers for the chill, he got cold so easily.  The thought of Ori left Dwalin feeling despondent and melancholy.  It had been nearly two weeks since the disastrous party.  Balin had called later in the evening, wondering what made Dwalin leave his boyfriend in the middle of a party and Dwalin had made up some excuse.

Since then he had avoiding the Rison's home like the plague.  He was sure that Ori hadn't told his brothers anything but Dwalin could only imagine the type of fury Dori would unleash if he knew what Dwalin and Ori had gotten into during that night.  Not to mention the ridicule he would have to endure from Nori.

No, it was better if Dwalin avoided the family entirely until the whole thing blew over.

Except for Nori, of course.  He and Dwalin had a few dates set up with Balin and Penelope, enough to keep the ruse going, except Dwalin's heart wasn't into it.  Nori had even brought them to his favorite restaurant bar last Thursday for happy hour drinks and food.  It had been much more Dwalin's speed and completely out of his brother's comfort zone.

Not even that date could bring Dwalin out of his fuzzy, cloudy state of mind.  He kept thinking of the kiss he shared with Ori, of how normal it felt to hold his hand and touch his face and tug him closer.  It felt more natural than anything else Dwalin had ever done in his life.

It was his day off and, since he was currently avoiding Ori, Dwalin was at home watching a stupid competition show on his TV.  He'd never felt so bored in his life but he didn't know what to do.

He didn't think this whole fake relationship thing through.  Balin wouldn't be angry if he and Nori broke up, but Dwalin knew his brother and knew he had his fair share of protectiveness.  If anything about their relationship went sour, Balin would certainly take some of it out on Nori.  But Dwalin couldn't force Nori into this forever, not with how quickly he and Bofur were getting on.

And then there was Ori.  Dwalin groaned and pressed his hands against his face.  Ori.  He couldn't get Ori out of his mind.  His playful smirk, the sparkle in his eyes, how gentle his fingers were against Dwalin's own.  The way he laughed when he had a particularly sharp comeback.

The sharp breath Ori had taken when Dwalin had kissed him deeply.  How easily they molded together, even as brief as it was.

What if, Dwalin wondered as he stared at his ceiling, what if he hadn't stopped?  What if he had managed to come up with some intricate lie and take Ori back to his apartment?  How far would he have gotten?  How far did he want to go?

His phone rang and Dwalin jumped, tearing his mind from the thought of Ori, red faced and giggling on his bed.  Dwalin answered without even checking the phone number.

"Hello?"

"We need to talk."

Dwalin winced.  Even over the phone, Dori's voice carried the disappointment of a thousand disappointed parents.

"What do you mean?" Dwalin played dumb.

Dori huffed.  "Ori has never talked to me about his personal life, but I know that he has carried a torch for you since Nori first dragged you home but you never noticed him.  I know that you've spent more time with Ori this past month than you ever have since you two met and I know something happened on Halloween.  So don't you play dumb with me, Dwalin."

Hearing it laid out so bare and simple sent Dwalin's head spinning.

"I'm in my office until 8 tonight," Dori continued.  "I expect to see you soon."

 

Dori was a professor at the local community college teaching English 101.  The semester was hitting its midpoint and Dwalin thought, for certain, that Dori would be drowning in papers to grade.  Apparently, Dori's concern for his brother outweighed his duty as a scholar.  Still, Dwalin knocked on the office door before pushing it open.

Like his desk at home, Dori's office desk was a mess of papers and books, pens and sticky notes.  He had a bookcase behind him that was mostly filled with academic texts, though a few were binders that held Ori's many unpublished writings.  A picture of the three brothers hung along the back wall and a small framed photo of their mother was placed carefully on top of the filing cabinets.

"Sit down," Dori instructed.

Dwalin sat.  The chair was uncomfortable but he didn't dare fidget underneath of Dori's watchful eye.

"So, Dwalin, what exactly are you doing?"

Dwalin considered lying or playing dumb.  But Dori would see right through that.  He had to live with Nori, after all.

"I don't know," he said honestly.  "I asked Nori because he said he'd done this before and it made sense.  We've been mates for years, I know him like I know Thorin.  Thought we'd go on a few dates, get Balin off my case, and move on.  Then things went all messed up and I don't know what to do or think.  I don't even know what I want anymore."

Dwalin's chest was heaving by the end of his short tirade.  It felt good to let it all off his chest and, now that he started, he couldn't stop.

"Nori's been with Bofur and anyone with eyes can see the way they look at each other," Dwalin looked down at his hands; it was easier than looking at Dori's face.  "But they're good guys and helped me at the party even when they didn't want to.  And then... I dunno, I wondered how to break it off with Nori so he could be with Bofur but not cause any ill intent from Balin."

"And what of Ori?" Dori prompted.

Dwalin couldn't help the soft smile that tugged at his lips at the thought of Ori.  Sweet, kind, intelligent, sarcastic, witty, Ori.  He thought of sitting at Bombur's diner across from Ori, laughing and talking as easily as breathing.  He remembered walking home from the bookstore, nudging each other on the sidewalk, heavy books in hand.  He remembered sitting on the couch, watching some grade b rom-com that Kili had been obsessed with.

"I don't - "

"Yes, you do," Dori interrupted.  "You do know, you're just scared.  So tell me, Dwalin.  What of Ori?"

Dwalin looked up from his hands, which were clenched tightly on his lap.  Dori didn't look mad, or disappointed, or surprised.  He looked expectant and eager, waiting for Dwalin's answer.

"It can't be," Dwalin said.  "I can't...  _feel_ that way and even if I did, what would he want with an old man like me?"

"Ten years isn't that large," Dori huffed.  "Why, our mother's first husband was nearly twelve years her senior.  The heart wants what the heart wants, Dwalin."

"How do I know this is what my heart wants?" Dwalin asked.  "Why has it never beat this way for him before?  What changed to make it suddenly want him in every possible way?  Why can't I sleep at night without thinking about him?  Why am I always wondering where he is and if he's happy?  Why is it, suddenly, I want to be beside him every second I can?  That I want to be the home he comes to at night, to be the last at night and first in the morning?"

Dwalin stood up then, his chest heaving and heart pounding.

"I've never looked at him twice until now.  You were right, Dori, he was just Nori's little brother and I never looked at him.  And now that I am, I want to look at nothing else for as long as I live."

"You're in love," Dori said.  "With Ori, of course."

Dwalin sat down hard, like a puppet with its strings cut.  Love.

"But Nori - Balin," Dwalin flubbed for words.  "I don't - what now?"

"Thanksgiving is next week," Dori's sudden subject change left Dwalin with his mouth open and mind spinning.  "Balin will be hosting this year and I'm sure everyone will be there.  My brothers and I certainly will be, as will Bofur and his family.  There's going to be a lot of secrets in not a lot of space.  Balin is no fool, he catch on quick if you try to hide something."

Dwalin groaned.  "Then what am I going to do?"

"It's a good thing you have a week," Dori chuckled.  "You're going to need it."


	7. The Secret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone!

Dwalin was beginning to regret walking to his brother's house for Thanksgiving.  The weather reports were promising snow this night and a cold wind was blowing through Dwalin's jacket.  Still, he was halfway there and if he walked home, picked up his car, and then drove back, he would be even more late than he already was.  Dwalin huffed and shouldered on.

Dori's car was already outside Balin's house, as was Bombur's van and Thorin's truck.  It looked like everyone was already there except for Dwalin, still puffing in the cold because his damn pride made him walk.

He walked right into the house, it was as much his as Balin's, and was immediately greeted by the sight of Ori.  The foyer opened up to different rooms downstairs, but straight ahead was the dining room.  A large table took up much of the space, covered with every dish imaginable.  Penelope and Bombur were chatting as they arranged the table.  Bombur's entire family was there, little kids running back and forth, with Mirra trying to keep them from breaking the dishes.

The kitchen opened up to a living room and another, smaller table for when Balin and Penelope weren't entertaining guests.  Bilbo and Dori were working around that table, setting place settings with the less expensive dishes and silverware - that would be the kids table then, where Mirra would be able to oversee all her children.

All of those things meant very little to Dwalin right now.  He hardly noticed the noise of Fili and Kili screaming at whatever video game they were playing in the next room over.  He barely glanced at Thorin wrapping an arm around Bilbo.  He didn't see Nori saunter down the stairs behind him, Bofur following soon after.

No, all of Dwalin's attention was on Ori, carefully setting down crystal goblets and nodding to whatever Bombur's oldest, Sera, was talking about.  He was dressed well, a dark purple sweater over a white button-up, the collar carefully pressed over the sweater.  It brought out the golden highlights in Ori's hair.  The sleeves were fitted and accented the slenderness of Ori's hands.

Ori laughed then and ruffled Sera's hair and Dwalin swallowed thickly.  It had been nearly a month since Dwalin had seen Ori, surely it was impossible for him to grow that much in so few days?

"At last he arrives!" Nori crowed and suddenly Nori was right next to Dwalin, a hand in his own and head on his shoulder.  Dwalin tried not to stiffen at the contact, but, judging from the squeeze of Nori's hand, he hadn't been so successful.  "What took you so long, honey?"

Dwalin blanched at the pet name but covered it up (hopefully) with a kiss on Nori's fingers.  They were warm.

"I walked here and forgot to check the time," Dwalin said, honestly.  "Though everything looks ready!"

"No thanks to you, brother!" Balin shouted from the kitchen.

Mirra swooped in suddenly, passing the baby in her arms off to Bofur, saying something about her kids needing to wash up before eating.  Bofur cooed down at his niece and he and Nori wandered off into the living room, making faces at the baby while she giggled and burbled.

Dwalin, feeling very much out of his depth, escaped upstairs.  The foyer and dining room were both open to the second floor and the upstairs hallway acted as an overlook for both rooms.  Balin and Penelope's bedroom was to the far left of the stairs and they had the second bedroom acting as Balin's office.  To the right, across the hallway, were two spare bedrooms, though one had been thoroughly claimed by Dwalin.

It was a plain bedroom, a full bed against one wall with a small end table.  The closet held a few of Dwalin's clothes and the bathroom across the hall had his favorite soap.  It was useful for nights Dwalin couldn't make it home.  He hadn't stayed over in months though and the room smelled faintly musty.

He could hear the chatter from below and sat down on the bed.  He should be down there, cuddled beside Nori and coddling Bombur and Mirra's youngest, acting the lovesick fool Balin believed he was.  He should be sending suggestive looks to Thorin and Bilbo and complimenting Penelope's food.

Instead he was here, in a dusty spare room, listening to the conversation as if it were hundreds of miles away instead of just downstairs.

Dwalin had had a week to come to terms that he was, if not already there, quickly falling in love with Ori.  But a week gave him no time to think about the consequences of that action or what actions he ought to take next.  He couldn't "break-up" with Nori on Thanksgiving, Nori deserved better than that, but the thought of sitting so close to Ori and being unable to do anything was worse.

Dwalin was pulled from his thoughts by a tentative knock at the door.  Dwalin hadn't closed it so he looked up to get a full view of Ori, awkwardly standing in the doorway.

"It's almost ready," Ori said.

"Thank you," Dwalin said.

"Um... can we talk?" Ori asked.  "Just before dinner gets started to... to clear the air."

Dwalin found himself nodding and Ori smiled briefly.

"If you want to forget about the whole thing, it's okay," Ori said.  "It wasn't fair for me to assume anything.  I shouldn't have put you in that position.  Whatever you decide is your choice and it was unfair for me to make you decide right away.  Heavens knows I didn't settle on my feelings for years and I should have let you take that time.  I didn't tell my brothers and I'll take the secret to my grave if I have to, just... say something!"

Dwalin stood up and walked to Ori.  He reached out, gentle and unsure, to run his fingers over Ori's cheek.

"I think I love you, Ori," Dwalin whispered.  Ori gasped and his face flushed pink.  "That's the only thing I can think of to explain how I feel, how deeply I care about you and how I think about you all the time."

Ori reached up and touched Dwalin's hand, fingers interlocking.  "You need to keep thinking then, Officer.  I have waited for you far too long for you to be hesitant.  If you don't know, then don't waste my time.  But I'll wait, as long as it takes, for you to make your decision."

Leaning up on his tiptoes, Ori pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of Dwalin's mouth.  Dwalin turned his head to catch Ori's lips in a full kiss.  His head spun with adrenaline and he pulled himself closer to Ori, his spare hand squeezing at Ori's waist.

"Not today," Ori pulled away.  "Think about this, about me, about us.  Think about Nori, about your brother.  Don't be reckless."

"You make me reckless," Dwalin growled.  He pulled Ori back in and kissed him deep.

"Oi!" Nori's voice cracked through the air.  "It's dinner time and Penelope - " Nori gave a sharp gasp.

Dwalin pulled himself together enough to break his kiss with Ori, only to see Nori standing outside the door.  His face was pale, mouth open in shock and he stared at Ori, held tightly in Dwalin's arms.

"What the fuck is this?!" Nori almost shouted.

Ori jumped from Dwalin's arms to shush his brother.  The open design of the house allowed any shouts from upstairs to be heard below and the last thing Dwalin needed was for Balin to come investigating.  Or for Bombur or Mirra to rush up at Nori's cursing.  Fuming,  Nori grabbed Ori and pushed him and Dwalin into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

"You two had better have a good explanation for all this!" Nori seethed.  "All the work I did for you, Dwalin, all the lies and dates, and for what?"

"It's my fault!" Ori interrupted, sliding neatly between Dwalin and Nori.  "I pushed him into this."

"No, you didn't," Dwalin stopped him.  "I'm sorry, Nori.  I wouldn't keep this from you if it was serious - "

"So it's not serious?" Nori snapped.  "What, just sleep with him and toss him aside?"

"No, not like that!"

"Then what is it?  Because either you used me to keep Ori your little secret or you're using Ori since you can't have me!"

"I don't know!" Dwalin shouted.  He wondered why he didn't know.  How long was he going to be able to keep that excuse?  "Would you just shut up and let me explain?"  Nori snapped his mouth shut and gave a terse nod.  Dwalin sighed; he could feel a headache building.

"It didn't start out that way.  You and I have been friends for so long it was easy to pretend to date you.  But then I started to spend more time with Ori and something about him made me want to spend more time with him, so I did.  So I kissed him, Halloween night, but I didn't know why, and I knew I shouldn't because of our agreement.  But then I couldn't stop thinking about it, about him, and I got so confused."

"Well, let's clear it up then, shall we?" Nori said.  "Why fake a relationship with me when you can have a real one with Ori?"

"Because of Balin," Ori piped up.  "Because of this lie you two created.  Until you break it off, nothing is going to happen." Ori's voice was cold and firm and Dwalin withered at the tone of it.  "Come on.  Let's have dinner and worry about this later."

 

Dinner was a rousing affair, it normally was with dozens of people swarmed around a table.  There was shouting and toasting.  Fili jumped from the kitchen back to the dining room with bottles of beer and wine, pouring them liberally into everyone's cups.  Bofur and Bombur were tossing rolls and hard-boiled eggs across the kitchen to each other and the kids started chanting at their table.

For all his class and standing, Balin wasn't immune to the celebratory mood and took part in the drinking contest halfway through the meal, one that Ori won.  Nori was sat beside Dwalin, but Bofur was across the table and Dwalin knew there was an epic game of footsie happening between them, if Bofur's flushed cheeks were anything to go by.

Soon they had eaten their fill and Dwalin was settled heavy in his seat, one arm slung over Nori's shoulder.

"Well!" Bilbo stood up with a huff, dislodging Thorin's hand from his shoulder.  "I'll take care of the dishes then, shall I, Penelope?"

"Naw, we got it," Fili grinned and picked up a plate, tossing it neatly over Ori's head and into Kili's hands.

Bilbo looked scandalized.  Penelope laughed as the rest of the dishes were literally thrown around the dining room and kitchen.  Bofur grabbed his silverware and started smacking them together, banging his fists on the table.  Dori and Nori caught on and the whole house was filled with the sounds of clanking silverware and banging feet.

"You!  Why!" Bilbo spluttered, trying to stop Kili from throwing a knife towards the sink, nearly impaling Bifur on its way.  "You'll blunt them!"

"Oh, really?" Bofur laughed and scraped his knife against Nori's.  "D'you hear that?  He says we'll blunt the knives!"

"Blunt the knives and bend the forks!" Kili chimed in from the kitchen.

"Smash the bottles and burn the corks," Fili added and threw a crystal goblet into the air, catching in nimbly and passing it off to Balin who juggled it before throwing it to Ori.

"Chip the glasses and crack the plates," Nori said.

"That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!"

Bilbo looked longingly at Thorin, as if asking for help while the entire kitchen descended into chaos.  Thorin only laughed.  The dishes made it safely to the sink, not one chip or crack on the dishes.  The food was put up in the fridge, whatever food was left at least, and everyone settled in.  Mirra and Bombur took their younger children upstairs for a nap while the older ones helped to start on cleaning the dishes.

Nori slipped away and Bofur followed a few moments later.  Dwalin scoffed; did they think they were being stealthy?  Dori shook his head from next to Dwalin, but he had a small smile on his face.

"It's good to see him happy," Thorin said, leaning across the table to talk to Dori.  "Properly happy."

"It is," Dori agreed, glancing out the front door where Nori and Bofur and run off to.  "They're good for each other."

"Speaking of," Dwalin said, wiggling his eyebrows at Thorin.  "Tell me about Bilbo."

Thorin didn't blush, it wasn't in his nature, but his cheeks did grow rosy pink and he averted his gaze.

"What about Bilbo?"

"You abandoned me on Halloween to go flirt!" Dwalin accused.

"Oh, I suppose I did."

"You suppose?"

"It's nothing of importance yet," Thorin said.  "We're taking it slow.  Dis would want to meet him first anyway.  But the boys approve."

"The boys would approve of anyone who keeps you from being so moody," Ori said and he elbowed Thorin.  Thorin snorted and elbowed back, causing Ori to giggle.

"I think it's sweet," Penelope said.  "It's clear that Bilbo dotes on you, Thorin.  You two are very sweet around each other."

"Thank you, Penelope," Thorin said.

"Almost as sweet as Dwalin is to Nori."

Dwalin coughed and Ori's laughter trailed off.  Trying to not remember what he was doing before dinner, Dwalin looked around the table for some subject change, only to realize that Balin was nowhere to be found.

"Where's Balin?"

"He went out front for a bit of air," Penelope said.  "The celebrations can get to him."

Dwalin felt like he'd just been gutted.  The food was heavy in his stomach and nausea whipped through him.  Thorin had completely frozen in his seat and Ori looked like he was going to faint.  Dori stood up and made a beeline for the front door.  Dwalin followed, knocking his chair over in the process.  Nori and Bofur had snuck outside and, if Dwalin was right, Balin was about to ruin everything.

Before Dori could reach the door, Balin had already slammed it open, face red with fury.  Behind him was Nori and Bofur, arms still around each other.  Nori caught Dwalin's gaze and bowed his head down sheepishly.

"Sorry, mate," Nori muttered.  "He's just so irresistible and, with you and Ori I thought - "

Balin turned on Dwalin then, a vein popping on his forehead.  "You and  _Ori_?"

"It's not what it sounds like," Dwalin started.

"Sounds like?" Balin shrieked.  "Sounds like?!  You and Nori are cheating on each other?  I thought you knew better!  I expected this from Nori," there was an indignant shout from Nori at that, "but from you?  I expected better."

"I wasn't dating Nori," Dwalin said suddenly.  His hands started shaking and he crossed his arms to hide it.  "I was never dating him.  I pretended to because you wouldn't leave me the hell alone.  Then he started seeing Bofur halfway through but agreed to keep up the act."

"The act?  Pretending?"

"You and Penelope kept setting me up!  You wouldn't leave me alone so I had to do something!"

"By faking this whole thing?"

"You wouldn't take no for an answer."

"But you looked so happy!  Especially these last few weeks!"

"Because I fell in love with Ori!"

The silence echoed in the house.  The kids were quiet and there was no clatter of the dishes being washed.  Balin's face went from red to white and he stood up tall, looking Dwalin square in the eyes.

"Go home, Dwalin," Balin said and Dwalin's body quivered with the coldness in Balin's voice.  "I don't know what's gotten into you, but you clearly need time to think things through, as do I."

"Balin - "

Balin shook his head and walked back to the kitchen.  Bombur and Mirra looked down from upstairs, their kids pressed against the railing, staring down with wide eyes.  Thorin held onto Bilbo, both of them staring at Dwalin with sad eyes.  Dwalin looked over to see Fili and Kili, shock clear as day on their faces.  His eyes sought out Ori, standing between the kitchen and the foyer, frozen in shock and eyes bright and wet.

Dwalin tore his eyes away and pushed his way past Dori out the door.


	8. The Middle

Dwalin woke up, bleary eyed and cotton mouthed.  He had taken a leave from work, saying it was about family and holidays, when really he had done nothing but lay in bed.  He couldn't believe how quickly all those lies went up in smoke.  He couldn't even blame Nori for what happened - he was upstairs making out with Ori after all.  If Balin had come to get them for dinner...

It didn't matter, really.  Dwalin groaned and rubbed at his gummy eyes.  His skin felt gross and his beard was in desperate need of a washing, but he couldn't bring himself to get up and move.  It felt foolish to be so worked up over something so trivial, but Dwalin felt as if his entire life had come crashing down.  He had, no doubt, lost the trust of his brother.

Dwalin couldn't go back to the Rison home.  He couldn't face Dori, Nori, and Ori, after the complete disaster that was Thanksgiving.  He couldn't look at Dori, with his patronizing gaze.  He couldn't see Nori with Bofur and not remember the look on Balin's face.  He couldn't imagine seeing Ori, being so close to him, and be so unsure of where they stood.

With a heavy groan, Dwalin rolled out of bed.  He rubbed at his face, his skin crusty underneath his hands.  He smelt like old clothes and musty sweat.  Couldn't expect much else from laying in bed for nearly a week on end.

The door to his front door opened.  Dwalin hobbled out of his bedroom.  Only one person could get into his apartment by themselves.

"You're not dead, are you?" Nori called out.

"No," Dwalin rasped.  He walked out to the living room, aware he was in just his boxers.

"Not for lack of trying, I see," Nori eyed him quickly.  "Go take a shower, I'll make you something to eat."

Dwalin could do nothing else except for do what Nori asked.  He took a long, hot shower, letting the days of oil and grime wash off him.  He felt infinitely better coming out of his bathroom, clean and fresh.  His thoughts were clear and, though he still didn't know what he was going to do, Dwalin felt much more capable of handling his future.

He dressed in soft sweat pants and a loose, long sleeve green shirt.  Something was sizzling in the kitchen and it smelled divine.  Dwalin's stomach growled appreciatively and he wandered back into the kitchen, his head spinning with the idea of food.

Nori was standing at the stove, frying eggs like he belonged in Dwalin's house.  Dwalin wished, suddenly and viciously, that it was Ori instead.  Nori turned around, a plate of eggs and toast in hand.  He set it down in front of Dwalin with a raised eyebrow.

Dwalin ate the food quickly, almost too quickly, but he couldn't remember the last time he made food instead of ordering in.  Nori sat quietly at the table, letting Dwalin eat his food in silence.

"So when are you going to talk to my little brother?" Nori asked, once Dwalin set down his fork.

"Probably never," Dwalin said.  "It's over, Nori.  We tried."

"Over?" Nori repeated.  "You're my friend, but you can't break my brother's heart again."

"Again?"

"After Thanksgiving, we talked," Nori said.  "Ori explained everything, about you two, how you've spent time together, what happened and what he said to you."

Dwalin groaned and let his head collapse onto the table.

"Your declaration at Thanksgiving threw him for a loop," Nori continued.  "He kept talking about how he was waiting for you to figure things out.  How he couldn't help but flirt with you while Dori and I were out but you were too thick to notice.  Then, out of the blue, you're declaring your love in front of your brother after all the secrets came crashing out."

"He deserves better, Nori," Dwalin said.  "He always has.  Don't know why he spent so long waiting for me any how."

"He loves you," Nori said.  "And you love him?"

"More than I thought I could," Dwalin said.

Nori hummed and grabbed Dwalin's plate.  "I know the feeling."

"Bofur?"

"Yeah," Nori grinned as he started washing the plate.  "He just makes me smile, makes me better.  The question is, Officer, what are you going to do now?"

There was only one option, really.

"I guess I'm going to talk to Ori."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was such a pain to write, wow. But the end is in sight! Thanks for reading!


	9. The Confession

Dwalin parked in front of Ori's house, his heart pounding aggressively in his chest.  His palms were sweaty as he turned the engine off.  He was Officer Fudinson, terror of criminals everywhere.  He had been shot at, stabbed, and in far too many car chases.  He had charged into drug dens, been chased by heroin addicts, and even received death threats for one particular arrest.

He was strong and brave and certainly a terror to behold, and here he was, quivering in his car and nervous beyond anything he's ever felt before.

Winter had descended on the city, covering everything in a white blanket.  It was still early December but the shops were decorated in reds and greens, gold and silver tinsel with holiday music playing in the stores.  Despite all the holiday cheer, Dwalin was still absurdly uneasy.

He and Balin hadn't talked yet, Dwalin didn't know what to say.  Besides, he had to patch this thing up with Ori before he could think about fixing things with his brother.

Certainly, and angry Dori and Nori would be worse than an angry Balin.  Balin tended to be much too logical and level headed to hold a grudge, but he would take his time to think though things before making a decision.  Dori and Nori, on the other hand, were quick tempered and protective of Ori.  They had been kind to Dwalin so far, but if Dwalin breaks Ori's heart again he might as well start digging his own grave.

Though Dwalin had no intention of breaking Ori's heart, not ever again.

Someone tapped on Dwalin's window and he jumped.  Outside was Ori, wearing a knitted hat and gloves, scarf wrapped around his neck.  He was smiling though and Dwalin forced himself out of his car.

"I was wondering if I'd ever see you again," Ori reached out and grabbed Dwalin's hand.

"Ori," Dwalin allowed himself to smile.  It had been so long since he'd seen Ori, he almost forgot how beautiful he was, cheeks reddened from the cold.

"I did miss you, you know," Ori said bashfully, looking down at their joined hands.  "I knew I said I would wait and I will wait, as long as it takes, but I missed talking with you and having you beside me."

Dwalin stopped listening, all he wanted in that moment was to wrap up Ori in his arms and kiss that mischievous smirk off Ori's face.  And, considering how long he had been waiting, Dwalin did just that.  He cradled Ori's face and pulled him up, kissing him soundly on the mouth.  Ori arched into Dwalin's arms, his hands immediately wrapping themselves around Dwalin's neck and pulling him closer.

There was a growl building deep in Dwalin's chest and he flipped Ori around, pinning him against the car and pressing themselves even closer.  Ori's kisses were just as sweet ad Dwalin remembered and the subtle bite of Ori's teeth as their kisses grew deeper and more heated sent fire down his spine.  Ori pulled himself away, his head falling back onto the roof of the car.  Dwalin, unable to stop now that he started, moved his lips down to Ori's neck.

"Dori will see," Ori gasped out, though his fingers tightened in Dwalin's hair.

"Let him," Dwalin growled, lifting his lips up to kiss underneath of Ori's jawline.  "Make him happy."

Ori's breath hitched and he turned his head to the side.  "He probably has a wedding planned already."

Dwalin pulled up then, taking a moment to look at what would become an impressive hickey on Ori's neck.  "A wedding?"

Ori sighed dramatically and framed Dwalin's face in his hands.  His eyelashes were sparkling in the dim light and Dwalin fell a little bit more in love as Ori looked up at him.

"I have pined after you for years, Officer," Ori said.  "Literal years, I have journals if you need proof.  I have loved you and only you and I doubt I'll love anyone else.  Have you made your decision?"

Dwalin bent down and pressed soft and tender kiss to Ori's lips, his eyes slipping shut as Ori returned it.

"I love you, Ori," Dwalin whispered.  "I love spending time with you and helping you with your writing.  I could live the rest of my life with my plants and books and never feel fulfilled without you by my side."

"Dwalin."

"I mean it!  I have been a fool but I wouldn't want my foolishness to take you away from me.  You have always been a better person, Ori, and I would happily spend the rest of my life proving that I'm worthy of your love."

"You have always been worthy, even if you couldn't see it."

This time it was Ori who brought Dwalin down for a kiss.


End file.
